Not a Couple

Since my husband left back in August 2004 for training and later to Iraq, I've experienced an unusual phenomenon. It's not so much a phenomenon as it is an unusual state of affairs. Until the wars in the Mideast, many military people and their families did not have to deal with seperation. Things have sure changed. After being alone for the last 8 months and while hoping to grow some socially, I figured out I don't fit into any neat category. I am not exactly part of a couple, I am not divorced, I am not a widow(thank God!) and I am not single being free to date.

For that very reason, when I am around people they don't know how to treat me. They have experience at dealing with friends who are divorced, widowers, have a sick spouse or are single. There are many of the usual platitudes ready for them to use in those cases.
But they are at a loss with someone unwillingly seperated from their spouse when it's not due to death or divorce. Truthfully, I don't think I would know what to say either. The same goes for fitting into a social situation. I am not even a good third wheel.

Before my husband left, we did not hang out with any couples friends. So as far as possible social activities for me, my grown daughter is one of the few adults I have to hang out with. While I might eventually drop by one of his friend's house to say hi, hanging out is not a viable option.

The Military Family Readiness group is somewhat active and while it may be a temporary friendship situation, it's the best I have if I want to go have fun with adults. We really do have a great group although it is small. Some of the group have spouses over in Iraq but most have children.

I think I lost my train of thought but my main point was I don't fit anywhere and that is making it hard for me to grow socially.

Things could be much worse though.
I could actually fit into one of the less desirable categories.